Boston Conference?

I've wondered, often, why being a "sixth grade teacher" isn't enough. I absolutely love my job. Even in its most stressed out moments, I still love it because I feel like I am really, actually, doing something for other people. It could be a combination of not only this sheer joy of having people pay attention to me (and what better than 11 year olds who still love learning), to the joy of doing something that for some unknown reason I am both good at, and the fulfillment of reading writing, even if it is sometimes about space aliens and monsters. Many of my fondest childhood moments, when not about a dollhouse, my father or the Redwall books, involve school. I can tell you the name of every teacher I had, and I can tell you what each of them gave me, especially Mr. S, Mrs. S, and Mrs. H. Perhaps I want to give that back.

However, watching the preview for Glee yesterday, I was struck when someone claimed that teaching was trying to recapture the glory days. Perhaps that it why, when I was at once dead set on teaching at my old high school, I am now dead-set against it. It could be that I have lost touch with many of my high school friends except for ANR and EPS, or that my male relationships from there failed so miserably (and thank goodness that they did.) But, I wonder if I struggle with teaching sometimes because it simply seems too easy--it seems like the glory days. I get paid to lay on the floor and read books, to build board games about the Middle Ages, and go to Art Museums.

Granted, I also get paid to write report cards, send heart-breaking emails to parents, monitor bullying, check the lunch room for cruel tween girls, be an advisor, be a role model, grade endless papers ABOUT monsters and aliens, be a spell checker (when I am, indeed, a rather terrible speller) and get my heart broken every June when they leave. Perhaps it is this latter list that is the reason I get frustrated when I try to explain the difference between a teacher and an educator. I don't go home at 3:45 and I'm not looking at this job as a convenient way to have children and still work. This is my life, even more so than a lawyer or a business analyst. I feel invested, differently.

So if it's so great, and so if I've been having anxious dreams about my "babies" moving on and a. forgetting me and b. not being prepared and c. worst of all, me not being anything I thought I might have been cracked up to be as an educator, why then, am I still anxious about telling people at cocktail parties that I teach sixth grade? Why do I seek out opportunities to travel and present at conferences, go to Israel, or write proposals of articles? Is it because I am still not confident enough in myself? Possibly.

Nonetheless, I have just submitted this proposal:

Title: Explorations: Discovering The Self Through Art

Topic: Using a variety of art forms within the guise of a middle school classroom as a mode of self-discovery, exploration, and community building, especially for gifted students.

Brief Description:
Using a protocol created by National School Reform Faculty called “Save The Last Word,” I will present Explorations—a class designed for sixth graders and taught in ability-leveled groups at Bernard Zell Day School in Chicago. “Save the Last Word” allows participants to highlight what was most meaningful to them in a text or packet and dialogue about questions this raised for them and for the larger world. The aforementioned class uses various art forms—from story-telling, to collage, to book-binding, to portraiture and art appreciation—as a means of developing self-identity within sixth graders. I will present the various units of the class—creation myths, a legendary figure unit, journaling, and portraiture (both self portraiture and teaching of how to look at art) through hands on displays of student work and words. Groups will then subdivide, each given a packet of the work that was presented. The groups will then discuss how and if the various art forms allowed students to have a solid understanding of both their identities and their classmates as well as whether or not creating and sharing art together helped to strengthen their community of learners.

Summarize Outcomes for Target Audience:
In a changing, technologically advanced world, it is difficult to know the self during the crucial teen/tween years. It is vital to encourage students, especially gifted ones worried about comparative performance and standardized test-taking, in creative ventures. These opportunities create learning through doing, community, and connection. The class was invaluable developing students’ self-knowledge. Through discussion, participants will use the students’ own artistic work as fodder to create essential questions on providing avenues for self-discovery and definition through a variety of art forms in their own communities.

I hope I get to go! We'll hear back at a much later date...

Summer Blockbusters and Enjoyment.

The past three weeks have been incredibly busy.

However, we have discovered the following amazing places to dine and drink:
Bar on Buena: This little local pace is incredibly delicious and has a lot of different regional beers and drink specials. We discovered it on a Sunday afternoon and ended up staying for their martinis. What? I don't have to go to work on Mondays.

Uncommon Ground: This little coffee shop offers free wi-fi and also dinner and drinks. Most of their foods are organic, or natural, or basically you just feel good after eating them. It maks everything a little more pricey, but the atmosphere is so chill. It bascially feels like if Anthropologie had food; you admire the decor as well as the precise nature that determines everything from the placement of food on the plate to the menu. C and I walked to Dairy Queen down on Southport and ended up stopping off there afterwards just to listen to some music and check out a great vibe.

Walker Brothers: I have been visiting this place since I was a kid. However, one of the first weekends I spend in Evanston with C, he said to me, "So, if you like breakfast, I should take you to this place..." Since then, he and I have known and expressed a mutual love for breakfast foods. We went there this past Sunday (and walked around the Evanston art fair. The most amazing chick I discovered there was Emma Overman. I want one of her pictures so badly. However, C and I don't really have a spare thousand lying around. I just love it so much. It's the organ picture, the first one on the page.) and for the first time, he experienced Potato Pancakes. I capitolize them because I forgot how much I loved them. It's too bad that Walker's is so far away, otherwise, I would come to eat there so much more. Or perhaps that's a good thing...

Wine Tasting: I definitely went to a wine tasting for the first time in the past few weeks. EPS won one at a med school dance and so she invited friends to come with her. We went to WineStyles in Evanston which is structured differently than most places that sell wine. It's structured by taste instead of region or anything else. So, I was able to buy some delicious wine, namely New Age white. It's basically sparkling apple juice. The wine has a little bit of effervesence, which I enjoyed. I also purchased some reds. They do free tastings on Tuesday evenings and Saturday afternoons which might be a fun experience, especially since I discovered that taking the El isn't so bad there! The evening was a lot of fun--but mainly just made me want to high-tail it out to California to go wine tasting. I don't think that's going to happen what with the leaving for Israel so soon.

Speaking of which, I desperately need to buy another pair of walking shoes. Okay, not another, ONE. I need to buy ONE pair of walking shoes. Do we like these [I don't...]? Or these, which I have labeled "chic old lady shoes"? How about these--I believe I am most into these, but I am worried about them being too hot? And finally, there's these which I am pretty sure are NOT what I am supposed to be buying, but are really cute.

Last weekend, we also checked out Powell's in Hyde Park. It is literally the kind of store that you can get lost in (with multiple levels and winding rooms, just like any good used book store). Powell's also has a location on Clarke Street in Wrigleyville which has always been very hit or miss to me (mainly miss) but this trip to Powell's resulted in not only stuff for myself and for C but also for my classroom. I'm incredibly excited about one of the projects that I run throughout the year which involves reading a book about a legendry figure (ie a biography) and I was trying to get away from run-of-the-mill projects on Jackie Robinson (not to denegrate what Jackie has done for the world, but come on people... there are TONS of influencial people out there). This book store had so many great little-known biographies like Isadora Duncan and Ella Fitzgerald. Granted, both of these people are relatively famous but, not really the kind of thing that kids are reading usually.

We also stopped at the annual antique car show in Oak Brook. This was a fabulous experience since my highly gregarious dad stopped one of the Packard convertible owners and asked him if it would be possible for the man to be our chaffeur during our weddng. We doubted he would simply just rent the car out. He did not rent the car out but definitely said that making a donation to his car club we could totally be driven about for the wedding. I have always thought it would be very neato (come on, if it's a fifties car, we should whip out some fifties slang) to have an old car in a weddng. Now, granted, I have not done much else in the vein of wedding planning... nor do I really like talking/thinking about it. However, that's one piece that's done.

The only other piece of wedding planning that we've got done is that we think we're going to take photographs at Graue Mill... we took some practice pictures to see what we'd think and I absolutely loved it. I'm glad we're starting to get a few things under control. Part of me wishes we could just run away to Ireland. Heh.

This past weekend, we threw a shindig at our very own house. There was much grilling, much drinking of wine and general happiness. ANR and her boyfriend came up for the evening, which is fun. Now that there's a place for them to stay the night, it's a lot easier for them to come up. On Saturday, we watched my godparents' son get married; they were actually not too pleased with the church service. Apparently the priest was a little flippiant and you couldn't even hear their vows. However, her dress was lovely and the evening was nice.

In the days leading up to Israel, I'm going to be doing a lot of packing and of course a lot of reading. I need to buy some books on the Kindle; right now, I have a Ken Follett book, which many people have said is a fun read for someone who teaches the Middle Ages. It's a chunky read, though. I also purchased a book on the Mob which I think might be a nice respite from serious learning. (: Yesterday, while in Evanston, we stumbled around a Borders, and I discovered three our four little books that I think I might want to add to my Kindle, including "The Little Book" and "The Angel's Game". As well as "Broken" (which sounded amazing) and "Let the Right One In" which sounded deliciously frightening.

Finally, I saw this book at Borders, which looks incredible. It's not available on the Kindle (sad for me) but I want to buy it so badly. However, there's a list of about 10,000 books that I need/want to read before then, so no more buying books. However, it looks incredibly intriguing. I've recently read The Book Thief which just made me frustrated that I was not a better writer and City of Thieves which was distrubing and enjoyable at the same time. Right now, I am reading another book for young adults as well as Revolutionary Road which is depressing but beautifully crafted.

Overall, the summer is really shaping up nicely, even without a C and A vacation!

And now, it is summer.

I ordered the following from Amazon.com today

1. Elliott Smith record
2. Rise Against record
3. Season 1 of TrueBlood (shh, I need something to do during the day that's not writing or reading... or yoga)
4. From Dawn to Decadence (for my "book club" with DD)

I am missing SYTYCD tonight--granted it has thus far only been a one week tradition, but most of me does not care. I was way into it. I'm going to have to figure out our dvr so that I can plan for it. I like the show, and I have a feeling I'll like it even more when I can dvr through the yelling woman who screams things about a tamale train.

Today, I am figuring out how to take public transportation up to Evanston with KB. We're meeting up with EPS and going to a wine tasting thing tonight. I'm just hoping it doesn't rain for long enough (which reminds me to grab an umbrella.) It's summer and definitely not feeling like it yet, aside from having nothing to do and getting dressed up on a random Tuesday to go to dinner. Scoozi is one of my favorite places--even if it's overblown Lettuce Entertain You kind of a place. It's quiet and people never seem to be around. Or going to Bar on Buena on a Sunday night with CA. All good things.

It's noon, well, after noon, and the only thing I have done so far is to do yoga, watch the Colbert Report and eat some cereal. I probably should get dressed...

This is why I'm going to work on writing a paper for this conference... I think it's important that I find something to do with my summers. I've also got other work projects to do. So, that's something...

The beginning of Summer.

And just like that, it's over.

That's the shocking thing, really. On Monday, I was stressed, trying to imagine how report cards, literary journal and more were all going to get done in the appropriate amount of time. I was thinking about my long weekend and what that was going to look like. I was thinking about how excited I was for SAI to come, about the addition of a seventh to the wedding party, and about how it seemed like the world would end when the babies left.

And just like that, it was over.

We hugged and cried on Friday, but I tried to remain composed. It was sadder and harder than I thought it was going to be, but I came to the realization that it was necessary. It would not be good for them to hold on to me forever; to grow, they must let go. It was more painful, this time, than last year. Last year, they cried and I carried the secret that I would move forward with them. No such secret here, however. One of the tiny ones gave a speech, talking about what I had done for her. It was too much to even cry; it makes me realize that this is the only thing that I can do. That I want to do.

And just like that, something new begins.

So, I start looking to planning and to Israel. I start looking to next year and how things might look different. I start thinking about those first day jitters and how strange it will be to have to know new names. How my babies are no longer babies. How they will date and hold hands and peck on the cheek. And how I will begin again, reminding people where homework goes and to put their hands down when other people are talking.

SAI was in town this weekend for alumni weekend. I saw extended family at a graduation party. There was much to do and see. I introduced C as my fiance. Things continue to move too quickly or not quickly enough. In the end, they continue moving. It was wonderful to see SAI, to get to speak and be in the same place for the first time in to long of a time. It says something that I was more focused on talking to her than taking pictures of her. To me, that's strange. And perhaps lovely.

I cannot wait to read books. And revel in the fact, finally, that this is my house.